The past couple years have been about growth and education for me. It seems like one class has rolled right into the next and I don’t see it stopping any time soon. With so much happening, I have gotten away from writing and sharing my adventures. I’d like to recommit because I think it will someday be interesting to witness the evolution.
I saw a new massage client today. Let’s call her Andi. She is a sweet woman, about my age. She suffers from insomnia, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, asthma, and low back pain. She is totally stressed out and and hasn’t taken any steps to help herself until today. She works full time, has a small child and a partner that works the night shift. I asked her if she was serious about getting well and she said yes. I started her treatment with energy work. I could immediately feel the huge burden she has been forcing herself to carry for a long time. I could feel she had made decisions in her life that she thought were mistakes. I could feel that she has been unable to forgive herself. Although the exact decisions weren’t revealed to me, I was aware that it was nothing of consequence at this time. It was things she was just unable to let go of and move past. As we started the massage, we spoke about her situation and how she could begin to tell herself a new story. We talked about the fact that it is her birth right to be happy and feel well on a regular basis regardless of what has happened in the past. I assured her that if she took certain steps towards this goal, she would not only feel better but that she would be a better mother and a more effective employee. Luckily, there was a full box of tissues because the flood gates broke open and I was able to witness a beautiful release. By the end of the treatment, Andi was feeling some relief.
I see so many women that suffer in a similar way. It’s like they are punishing themselves for things that were done or not done so long. It’s a vicious cycle. The more they punish themselves by not doing good things for the body, the worse they feel. The worse they feel, the less good they do for the body. When we begin to see our own worth, and treat ourselves accordingly, we can begin to take more steps to loving and forgiving ourselves.
I live by a program that states, “We will not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door on it.” The past has gotten me to where I am today, but it is not who I am today. We have all made what we consider to be mistakes, but for today, I choose forgiveness and love.