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thank you, cancer

“The doctor says the cancer is back,” she told me very nonchalantly. “He said it’s slow growing and nothing to worry about, so I’m not going worry.”
Bullshit! I know what it’s like to have a doctor tell you that you have cancer. It’s the scariest thing I’ve ever experienced. It’s great for someone to say that you don’t need to worry, but they aren’t the one with cancer! I’m sorry, I don’t believe that she won’t worry. And she should worry!

I was recently in a journaling workshop. One of the assignments was to write a letter to someone or something. I chose cancer. I thanked it for its visit. For leaving me with only two scars. I thanked it for the true gift I received from it: the ability and strength to live a life more in line with my ideals. You see, upon hearing the diagnosis, I realized that things couldn’t stay the same if I wanted different results. If I wanted my body to move towards wellness, I needed to support it in any way I could. Our bodies naturally seek to move towards homeostasis. Something like cancer can be a big red flag that our body is waving saying, “Hello! Over here!” Please don’t misunderstand me, I am not saying that all types of cancer are self induced. There are many cancers that we have absolutely no control over. In my case, I had melanoma. Because of my coloring, I am at a higher risk for this disease. I spent a lot of years mistreating my body and although I don’t feel like I was being punished for that, I do believe that there are far reaching consequences to our actions. I am far from perfect, but I try to make better decisions with regards to my overall wellness now. Whether it’s what I am eating or who I am speaking with or what I am reading. It really does all matter. I have a lot to do for the next 40 years and I want to do it in a body that feels good!

Anyway, we will find out more about my mother-in-law next week. She will start the craziness of doctors, tests, and treatments. That alone is enough to kill you. Maybe because there are so many people who have cancer, the people who work in the field seemed cold. There wasn’t to much hand holding or compassion. Going to get a PET scan was the worst. Actually the technicians who did it were very nice. The problem was that they came into my room wearing hazmat suits and carrying a metal case. They opened the case very carefully and injected me with radioactive liquid! It seems so crazy to inject a cancer patient with a known carcinogen like it’s business as usual. I feel sad that we don’t live closer to my mother-in-law. I would like to be there to support her and hold her hand. I hope the rest of the family is doing that. She is going to need it. I know she is worried.

Nutritional tip #2- know the dirty dozen. Go to and print a copy of the dirty dozen. These fruits and vegetables should be bought organic as much as possible. The list also includes the cleanest fruits and vegetables which are ok to buy conventional. Keep the list in your wallet so you can refer to it while shopping.

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